Tag Archive | wife

Respect your Husband

This afternoon I and my fiancé returned following the second session of premarital counseling and once again as a couple who will get married we got a wonderful blessing from God. We have learned more about Christian Marriage. I am trying to summarized the counseling materials and very pleased to share to all of you..

Today’s topic focused more directly to womenas a wife. The emphasis is on how to respect my husband. Many marriages begin well and end poorly because men and women are not properly trained in how to treat one another. God has specific roles for the husband and the wife and when we stay within those roles we have happy marriages and good family lives. Here are some important things that must be done by a wife.

“And the Lord God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him”. (Genesis 2:18)

Treatandrespect himas a leader

God gave you your husband as the leader in your home. This means that he is not only the Spiritual leader; he is the one who make decisions.  Women are ill-equipped to make large decisions; we are far too emotional for that big responsibility. Your part in the decision process could be to help him be the leader by providing him with information that will aid in decision-making. And remember that just because you provided information, this does not mean that your husband will consider that information.  He chooses what to use in the decision process; a wise husband will ask for his wife’s advice.  When he chooses not to consider your information and/or advice let him take responsibility for the decision, be it good or bad.  Never, ever say “I told you so” or words to that effect when a decision has gone bad.  When he makes good decisions thank him for taking that burden. Remember to avoid getting leadership and advice from other males in your life such as your pastor, friend or even your brother. Take a look at what the Bible says about your husband’s role as leader and head of the wife:

Ephesians 5:22-24 Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife even as Christ is the head of the church, his body, and is himself its Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit in everything to their husbands.

Respect His Maleness 

Accept the fact that God made you the weaker vessel. This is one of those things that have taken me many years to do.  I am a strong willed woman and many times I have tried to do things that I needed not to do. I now am thankful that my husband carries the heavy packages and opens the doors for me. He is being what God has made him to be, my protector – not only for safely sake but for my own health and well-being. You were created for him, as his helper. Let your husband be the strong one and when he is, praise him for it and thank God for him. Let him open that pickle jar; even if you loosened it for him. Here are some Bible verses for this hint:

1 Peter 3:7 Likewise, husbands, live with your wives in an understanding way, showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life, so that your prayers may not be hindered.

1 Corinthians 11:9 Neither was man created for woman, but woman for man.

Respect as an Attitude

There are times when the husband is not respectful to the wife. This does not give you license to be disrespectful. You cannot control his actions, but you can control your reactions. You see, respect is not only seen in your actions (as a verb) but it is also seen in your attitude (as a noun). When you show an attitude of respect toward your husband he will think twice about the way that he is treating you. Love him, even when he is unlovely. Serve him, even when he seems not to appreciate your service. Listen to him, even when you may not understand what he is talking about. Be attentive to his physical needs, even when you are tired.  God will bless you and your marriage when you remember to have a respectful attitude.  Bible guidelines for this are:

Romans 12:21 Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.

Philippians 2:3-4 (KJV) Let nothing be done through strife or vainglory; but in lowliness of mind let each esteem other better than themselves. Look not every man on his own things, but every man also on the things of others.

Respect His Reputation 

Don’t air your dirty laundry. When you are in the company of others you should never be saying things that tear your husband down. Instead you should be saying only good about him. Brag on him! Be faithful to him in thought, word and deed. This includes what you say and do in front of the children. Teach them to respect their Daddy, he is their protector too and they should see him as a hero. The Bible is loaded with this concept, here are a few verses:

Proverbs 12:7 An excellent wife is the crown of her husband, but she who brings shame is like rottenness in his bones.

Proverbs 31:11-12 The heart of her husband trusts in her, and he will have no lack of gain. She does him good, and not harm, all the days of her life. 

Romans 14:19 Let us therefore follow after the things which make for peace, and things wherewith one may edify another.

Hebrews 13:4 Let marriage be held in honor among all, and let the marriage bed be undefiled, for God will judge the sexually immoral and adulterous. 

Respect His Provision 

This is a Biblical principle that has been overlooked in our modern world.  In the day of the two-income family, we have come to depend upon the wife’s income to provide for the needs of the family. This ought not to be. Don’t misunderstand; I realize that sometimes it is necessary for a woman to work outside of the home, in the case where the husband is physically unable.  However, when your husband is able to provide for the family – let him do it! Here is the Biblical standard on the husband as the provider: 

Genesis 3:17-20 And to Adam he said,”Because you have listened to the voice of your wife and have eaten of the tree of which I commanded you, ’You shall not eat of it,’ cursed is the ground because of you; in pain you shall eat of it all the days of your life; thorns and thistles it shall bring forth for you; and you shall eat the plants of the field. By the sweat of your face you shall eat bread, till you return to the ground, for out of it you were taken; for you are dust, and to dust you shall return.”

Respect His Home 

Make your house a home, no matter what the living circumstance. Make it comfortable and clean. Make the bed. Clean up the dirty dishes. Keep up with the laundry. Your husband works hard and he deserves a cozy home after a hard day. Get up before your husband and the children – set the tone for the day.  When you have things in order your day will run smoother for your entire household. Teach the children to clean up after themselves and how to do daily and weekly chores. All this should be done without grumbling or complaining.

Titus 2:4-5 and so train the young women to love their husbands and children, to be self-controlled, pure, working at home, kind, and submissive to their own husbands, that the word of God may not be reviled.

Philippians 2:14 Do all things without grumbling or questioning 

The Counseling today concludes with a question: are you ready to become a good Christian wife?

This material counseling was taken from an article “How to respect your husband “Written by Pamela Rose Williams

Summarized by Karina

 

 

 

The Three Old Man

last3WSLA woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said “I don’t think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat.”
“Is the man of the house home?” they asked.
“No”, she replied. “He’s out.”
“Then we cannot come in”, they replied.
In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.
“Go tell them I am home and invite them in!”
The woman went out and invited the men in”
“We do not go into a House together,” they replied.
“Why is that?” she asked.


One of the old men explained: “His name is Wealth,” he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, “He is Success, and I am Love.” Then he added, “Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home.”
The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. “How nice!!” he said. “Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!”


His wife disagreed. “My dear, why don’t we invite Success?”
Their daughter was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: “Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!”
“Let us heed our daughter’s advice,” said the husband to his wife.“Go out and invite Love to be our guest.”

 The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, “Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest.”
Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: “I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?”
The old men replied together: “If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would’ve stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him.

“Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success…”

 Photo credits : chweetones.blogspot.com

Life Together

 

old-couple-holding-handsOne fine day, an old couple around the age of 70 walks into a lawyer’s office. Apparently, they are there to file a divorce.

Lawyer was very puzzled, after having a chat with them, he got their story….
This couple had been quarreling throughout their 40 plus years of marriage. Nothing ever seems to go right.

They hang on because of their children, afraid that it might affect their up-bringing. Now, all their children have already grown up, have their own family, there’s nothing else the old couple have to worry about. All they wanted is to lead their own life free from all these years of unhappiness from their marriage, so both agreed on a divorce….

Lawyer was having a hard time trying to get the papers done, because he felt that after 40 years of marriage at the age of 70, he couldn’t understand why the old couple would still want a divorce..

While they were signing the papers, the wife told the husband..
“I really love you, but i really can’t carry on anymore, I’m sorry..”
“It’s o.k., I understand..” said the husband. Looking at this, the lawyer suggested a dinner together with just the three of them. The wife thought, “Why not? since they are still gonna be friends..”

At the dining table, there was an awkward silence. The first dish was roasted chicken. Immediately, the old man took the drumstick for the old lady..
“Take this; it’s your favorite…”

Looking at this, the lawyer thought there might still be a chance for the relationship, but the wife was frowning when she answered..
“This is always the problem. You always think so highly of yourself and never thought about how I feel. Don’t you know that I hate drumsticks?”

Little did she know that over the years, the husband have been trying all ways to please her. Little did she know that drumsticks were the husband’s favorites? Little did he know that she never thought he understand her at all. Little did he know that she hates drumsticks even though all he wants is the best for her?

That night, both of them couldn’t sleep. Through the night, they toss and turn repeatedly… After hours, the old man couldn’t take it anymore, he knows that he still loves her, and he can’t carry on life without her. He wants her back; he wants to tell her he is sorry. He wanted to tell her “I love you”…

He picks up the phone, started dialing her number…. The ringing never stops.. He never stopped dialing….

On the other side, she was sad. She couldn’t understand how come after all these years; he still doesn’t understand her at all. She loves him a lot, but she just can’t take it anymore…. The phone rang but she refuses to answer knowing that it’s him…
“What’s the point of talking now that it’s over… I have asked for it and now I want to keep it this way. If not I will lose face…” She thought. With the phone still ringing, she decided to pull out the phone cord…

Little did she remember, he had heart problems…

The next day, she received news that he had passed away… She rushed down to his apartment and saw his body lying on the couch still holding on to the phone. He had a heart attack when he was trying to get through to her phone line….

As sad as she was, she have to clear his belongings. When she was looking through the drawers, she saw this insurance policy dated from the day they got married with the beneficiary being her. And together in those files, there was this note.

“To my dearest wife,

By the time you’re reading this, I’m sure I’m no longer around. I bought this policy for you. Though the amount is only $100k, I hope it will be able to help me continue my promise that I have made when we got married. I might not be around anymore but I want this amount of money to continue taking care of you just like the way I will if I could have live longer. I want you to know I will always be around by your side. I love you. “

Tears flowed like river……

 “When you love someone, let them know… You never know what will happen the next minute… Learn to build a life together.. Learn to love each other… For who they are.. Not what they are…”


photo credits :
healthyhappyhumanbeings.com

Love and Life

Two years of courtship and now, five years into marriage, I would have to admit, that I am getting tired of it. The reasons of me loving him before, has now transformed into the cause of all my restlessness.

 I am a sentimental woman and extremely sensitive when it comes to a relationship and my feelings. I yearn for the romantic moments,

like a little girl yearning for candy. My husband is my complete opposite; his lack of sensitivity, and the inability of bringing romantic moments into our marriage has disheartened me about LOVE.

 One day, I finally decided to tell him my decision, that I wanted a divorce.

 “Why?” he asked, shocked.

 “I am tired. There are no reasons for everything in the world!” I answered.

He kept silent the whole night, seemingly in deep thought. My feeling of disappointment only increased. Here was a man who was not able to even express his predicament, so what else could I expect from him?

 And finally he asked me: “What can I do to change your mind?”

 Somebody said it right… It`s hard to change a person`s personality, and I guess, I have started losing faith in him.

 Looking deep into his eyes I slowly answered: “Here is the question. If you can answer and convince my heart, I will change my mind.

 Let`s say, I want a flower located on the face of a mountain cliff, and we both are sure that picking the flower will cause your death. Will you do it for me?”

 He said: “I will give you your answer tomorrow…. “

 My hopes just sank by listening to his response.

 I woke up the next morning to find him gone, and saw a piece of paper with his scratchy handwriting underneath a milk glass, on the

dining table near the front door, that goes….

 My dear, “I would not pick that flower for you, but….please allow me to explain the reasons further…..

 This first line was already breaking my heart. I continued reading.

 “When you use the computer you always mess up the Software programs, and you cry in front of the screen. I have to save my fingers so that I can help to restore the programs.

 You always leave the house keys behind, thus I have to save my legs to rush home to open the door for you.

 You love traveling but always lose your way in a new city. I have to save my eyes to show you the way.

 You always have the cramps whenever your “good friend” approaches every month. I have to save my palms so that I can calm the cramps in your tummy.

 You like to stay indoors, and I worry that you will be infected by infantile autism. I have to save my mouth to tell you jokes and stories to cure your boredom.

 You always stare at the computer, and that will do nothing good for your eyes. I have to save my eyes so that when we grow old, I can help to clip your nails and help to remove those annoying white hairs. So I can also hold your hand while strolling down the beach, as you enjoy the sunshine and the beautiful sand…and tell you the colour of flowers, just like the colour of the glow on your young face…

 Thus, my dear, unless I am sure that there is someone who loves you more than I do… I could not pick that flower yet, and die … “

 My tears fell on the letter, and blurred the ink of his handwriting. .. and as I continue on reading… “Now, that you have finished reading my answer, and if you are satisfied, please open the front door for I am standing outside bringing your favorite bread and fresh milk…

 I rushed to pull open the door, and saw his anxious face, clutching tightly with his hands, the milk bottle and loaf of bread….Now I am very sure that no one will ever love me as much as he does, and I have decided to leave the flower alone…

 That`s LIFE, and LOVE. When one is surrounded by love, the feeling of excitement fades away, and one tends to ignore the true love that lies in between the peace and dullness.

 Love shows up in all forms; even in very small and cheeky forms. It has never been a model. It could be the dullest and most boring form …

 Flowers, and romantic moments are only used and appear on the surface of the relationship. Under all this, the pillar of true love stands… AND THAT`S LIFE

 So what are you cribbing and complaining in life.. find the best in your parters, appreciate and acknowledge it … today… now.

 http://lqcollections.blogspot.com

My Sweet little Angel

My wife called, ‘How long will you be with that newspaper? Will you come here and make your darling daughter eat her food?’ I tossed the paper away and rushed to the scene. My only daughter Sindu looked frightened.

Tears were welling up in her eyes. In front of her was a bowl filled to its brim with Curd Rice. Sindu is a nice child, quite intelligent for her age.She has just turned eight. She particularly detested Curd Rice. My mother and my wife are orthodox, and believe firmly in the ‘cooling effects’ of Curd Rice!
I cleared my throat, and picked up the bowl. ‘Sindu, darling,why don’t you take a few mouthful of this Curd Rice?Just for Dad’s sake, dear.
Sindu softened a bit, and wiped her tears with the back of her hands. ‘OK, Dad. I will eat – not just a few
mouthfuls, but the whole lot of this. But, you should…’ Sindu hesitated. ‘Dad, if I eat this entire curd Rice, will you give me whatever I ask for?’………..Oh sure, darling’….’Promise?’……………..
‘Promise’. I covered the pink soft hand extended by my daughter with mine, and clinch the deal.
‘Ask Mom also to give a similar promise’, my daughter insisted.
My wife put her hand on Sindu’s, muttering ‘Promise’.
Now I became a bit anxious. ‘Sindu dear, you shouldn’t insist on getting a computer or any such expensive items.Dad does not have that kind of money right now. OK?’
‘No, Dad. I do not want anything expensive’.Slowly and painfully, she finished eating the whole quantity.
I was silently angry with my wife and my mother for forcing my child eat something that she detested.
After the ordeal was through, Sindu came to me with her eyes wide with expectation.All our attention was on her………….’Dad, I want to have my head shaved off, this Sunday!’ was her demand.
‘Atrocious!’ shouted my wife, ‘A girl child having her head shaved off? Impossible!’ ‘Never in our family!’ my mother rasp. ‘She has been watching too much of television. Our culture is getting totally spoiled with these TV programs!’
Sindu darling, why don’t you ask for something else? We will be sad seeing you with a clean-shaven head.’
‘No, Dad. I do not want anything else’, Sindu said with finality.
‘Please, Sindu, why don’t you try to understand our feelings?’ I tried to plead with her.
‘Dad, you saw how difficult it was for me to eat that Curd Rice’. Sindu was in tears. ‘And you promised to grant me whatever I ask for.Now, you are going back on your words. Was it not you who told me the story of King Harishchandra,and its moral that we should honor our promises no matter what?’
It was time for me to call the shots. ‘Our promise must be kept.’
‘Are you out your mind?’ chorused my mother and wife.
‘No. If we go back on our promises, she will never learn to honor her own. Sindu, your wish will be fulfilled.’
With her head clean-shaven, Sindu had a round-face, and her eyes looked big and beautiful.
On Monday morning, I dropped her at her school. It was a sight to watch my hairless Sindu walking towards her classroom.She turned around and waved. I waved back with a smile.
Just then, a boy alighted from a car, and shouted, ‘Sinduja, please wait for me!’
What struck me was the hairless head of that boy. ‘May be, that is the in-stuff’, I thought.
‘Sir, your daughter Sinduja is great indeed!’ Without introducing herself, a lady got out of the car, and continued,’ That boy who is walking along with your daughter is my son Harish.He is suffering from… … leukemia.’ She paused to muffle her sobs. Harish could not attend the school for the whole of the last month.He lost all his hair due to the side effects of the chemotherapy. He refused to come back to school fearing the unintentional but cruel teasing of the schoolmates’Sinduja visited him last week, and promised him that she will take care of the teasing issue.
But, I never imagined she would sacrifice her lovely hair for the sake of my son!
Sir, you and your wife are blessed to have such a noble soul as your daughter.’
I stood transfix. And then, I wept. ‘My little Angel, you are teaching me how self-less real love is!’
*The happiest people on this planet are not those who live on their own terms but are those who change their terms for the ones whom they love..*

http://tearsflow.blogspot.com

Honey, What’s for Dinner ?

 

A man feared his wife wasn’t hearing as well as she used to and he  thought she might need a hearing aid. Not quite sure how to approach her, he called the family Doctor to discuss the problem. 

The Doctor told him there is a simple informal test the husband could perform to give the Doctor a better idea about her hearing loss.

Here’s what you do,” said the Doctor, “stand about 40 feet away from  her, and in a normal conversational speaking tone see if she hears you.

If not, go to 30 feet, then 20 feet, and s o on until you get a  response.”

That evening, the wife is in the kitchen cooking dinner, and he was in  the den. He says to himself, “I’m about 40 feet away, let’s see what happens.”

Then in a normal tone he asks, ‘Honey, what’s for dinner?”

No response.

So the husband moves to closer to the kitchen, about 30 feet from his  wife and repeats, “Honey, what’s for dinner?”

Still no response.

Next he moves into the dining room where he is about 20 feet from his  wife and asks, Honey, what’s for dinner?”

Again he gets no response so,

He walks up to the kitchen door, about 10 feet away. “Honey, what’s for  dinner?”

Again there is no response.

So he walks right up behind her. “Honey, what’s for dinner?”
.
.
.
.
.
“Smith, for the FIFTH time I’ve said, CHICKEN!”

Moral of the story:

The problem may not be with the other one as we always think, could be very much within us..!

 http://inspireurfriend.blogspot.com

A very poor man lived with his wife…

 

One day, his wife, who had very long hair, asked him to buy her a comb for her hair to grow well and to be well-groomed… The man felt very sorry and said; “NO”

He explained that he did not even have enough money to fix the strap of his watch he had just
broken… She did not insist on her request..

The man went to work and passed by a watch shop, sold his damaged watch at a low price and went to buy a comb for his wife…

He came home in the evening with the comb in his hand ready to give to his wife…

He was surprised when he saw his wife with a very short hair cut..

She had sold her hair and was holding a new watch band..

Tears flowed simultaneously from their eyes, not for the futility of their actions.., but, for the reciprocity of their love…

MORAL: To love is nothing, to be loved is something but to love and to be loved by the one you love,
that is EVERYTHING…

Never take love for granted… ?