Hello, my dear friend! In this mother’s day I wanted to share something that changed my life. Well, when I was a teenager I had a little problem with my mother. We had a less harmonious relationship. After celebrating my 17th birthday, she came to my room brought a small box of gift and a letter. At the time she said, “Here’s a special birthday gift from me and this is a letter that I have written quite long time. I just waiting for the right moment to give this letter to you. My princess, I realize we have a bit problem with our relationship but I as your mother, I deeply understand and always struggling to make our relationship better. I hope and pray, when you read this letter you will understand too and also want to make a better relationship with me.”
At first I wasn’t interested in reading my mother’s letter, but somehow I felt there was a very strong urge to open and read the letter. Then I read it. My dear friends, after I finished read my mom’s letter, I cannot hold my cry. Then I ran to my mom, I hugged her tightly, and along with my crying I said, “Mom, please forgive me…Please forgive me… I love you, mom! I love you…”
My beloved readers, after my mother granted me a permission, I want to share her letter to all of you. I hope and pray this letter could be a reminder to all of us that figure of mother is incredible figure in this world. There’s always unseen tears in the mother’s heart, there’s a pain behind her smile, and there’s fatigue behind her eyes. But she never complained. She chose to hide her sadness behind her sweet smile, she chose hide her tears behind her shining eyes, she chose to hide her pain behind her laugh, she chose bring her hurt into prayer. Here’s my mom letter,
To my little princess,
When I was married, I never thought about what kind of child I want to have, I never thought how to care for and the way I raise my child. I just live my life.
When I gave birth you, I was experiencing a terrible pain that equal with the broken body bones at the same time. I felt a pain beyond the pain that any man in this world can bear. I almost give up! But for the sake of to see you born and live in this world, I struggled against the threat of fear of the death. I risked my own life for you.
When I saw and hugged you for the first time, I was speechless. There was only a deep sense of emotion, and unstoppable happy tears and proud came out from my eyes. You know, at the time no matter how hard and difficult, I immediately promised to myself and to God I will take care and raise you with both of my hands.
It wasn’t easy to raise you. It wasn’t so easy to made you grows. It wasn’t a simple matter teaches you many important things about life. Not infrequently when you were angry at me, you even yelled at me. But it doesn’t matter at all. For me, it all was a part of process toward a goodness. A process to form you to be good.
When you felt grown up, you felt restricted. You should not do this and that. You think I’m old-fashioned, out of date, and unable to understand what you want. When we were walking together, you choose to keep distance from me. Maybe you as grow up girl, you felt ashamed still walking with her mother, or you just didn’t like my dress that I wore
To be honest, in the deepest of my heart I sometime felt hurt! But when I remember the first time I hugged and carried you, my hurt immediately vanished. You are still my one and only daughter. Whatever happens I love you and will always love you. You’re my reason to keep survive, and beside God you’re the source of my strength. You’re the one who makes me willing to work hard all day long even though I have to feel sorrow, pain, and suffering. Because of your presence I feel so meaningful especially when I hear you call me, mother!
My dear princess, maybe the time of my presence in this world is limited. If you work hard and success, you don’t need to give me a luxurious palace and an abundant wealth. Keep it for yourself. I just hope and pray you’re willing to set aside a bit your time for me. Sitting beside me and talks heart to heat is enough for me.
I’m so proud of you. Please forgive me if I once hurt you, scolded you, forbade you to do what you want to do. Believe me, it’s all just because I want you to be a good girl and fear to God. I always love you, yesterday, now and forever.
My beloved readers, I end this post with a poem for my mother
God has given me a disguise Angel with a strong wings and a gold heart,
She so selfless, so giving as she can be, she shares her mercy without thinking about herself
She risked her own life for the sake of my safety
She is so faithful, wise, and so kind.
She gives a never ending love and unstoppable prayer for a reason I always fine
God has given me a blessing a tremendous hero all the time,
And I am so proud call the angel, Mother!
Happy mother’s day, Mom. Please forgive me. I always love you, yesterday, now, and forever.
“Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne?
Though she may forget, I will not forget you! (Isaiah 49:15)
Karina – Living by faith
Image source: Google images