First I saw God as my observer, my judge keeping track of the things I did wrong, so as to know whether I merited heaven or hell when I die. He was out there, sort of the President. I recognized his picture when I saw it, but I didn’t really know Him.
Later on, when I recognized my higher power, it seemed as though life was rather like a bike ride… but, it was a tandem bike, and I noticed that God was in the back letting me treadle. I don’t know just when it was that he suggested to me we change places, but life has not been the same since… life with my higher power, that is makes life exciting!!!
When I had control, I knew the way. It was rather boring, but predictable. It was the shortest distance between two points. But when He took the lead, He knew insightful long cuts, up mountains, and through rocky places and at breakneck speed. It was all I could do to hang on, even though it looked like madness, He said, “have faith.”
Feeling worried and anxious I asked, “Where are you taking me?” He laughed and didn’t answer, and I started to learn to trust.
I let go of my boring life and entered into the adventure, and when I said, “I’m scared.” He’d lean back and touch my hand. He took me to people with gifts that I needed, gifts of healing, acceptance and joy. They gave me their gifts to take with me on my journey… our journey. God’s and mine and we’re off again. He said, “Give the gifts away; they’re extra baggage, too much weight.” So I did, to the people I met, and found that in giving, I received, and still my burden was light.
I did not trust Him at first, in control of my life, I thought He’d wrecked it, but He knows bike secrets. He knows how to make it bend to take sharp corners, jump to clear high passes, and fly through shorter scary passages.
I am learning to shut up and peddle in the strangest places, and I’m beginning to enjoy the view, and the cool breeze on my face, with God as my pure light, as my constant source of inner power.
When I’m sure I just can’t do any more, He smiles and says, “just keep pedaling”.